Last Friday I entered a new phase of adulthood: I had my wisdom teeth removed.To keep a long story short, the surgery (?) went well. I opted out of the anesthesia, however, the dentist choked my gums up with so many pain-numbing shots, I can't claim any heroic behavior...unlike my dear mother who once had a tooth removed without pain-killer...ahhh! While three of the teeth took only minutes to extract, the fourth stubborn tooth took nearly 45minutes because as my dentist explained, it was heavily "impacted"...yeah no joke. The dentist also told me to make sure our kids got the job done promptly....17 being a good age. I guess stubborn teeth will be a genetic trait in our family.
Anyways, moving on to more introspective matters...the whole idea of "wisdom" teeth made me wonder, "Why are they called wisdom teeth?" At this moment, my twitching fingers are tempted to cheat and wikipedia the term, but I have challenged myself to analyze this question and so, here are my thoughts...
Removing wisdom teeth is like a rite of passage, an entry into the adult world. Of course, there are other rites of passage: getting a driver's license (and later paying for driver's insurance), moving out of the parents' house, getting a "real" job, getting married, having kids, the list goes on...But the difference is these are all non-physical rites (well except maybe for the actual having kids). Removing your wisdom teeth is something physical. For lack of a more eloquent explanation...it is a physical change in who you are. "Primitive" cultures do this thing all the time...tattooes, piercings, trials of physical endurance...these are all marks of making the transition from youth to adulthood.
As a rite of passage, I now feel more wise. Perhaps it is a placebo effect. Or perhaps, it is the vicadin affecting my thought processes. But, all the same, I feel more wise. The down time I have had in the last two days, has forced me to think of wise things I have learned since my youth. Here they are:
1. Our bodies are not invincible. I think I have truly reached the point in my life where I believe this. No longer can I jump from a high place, wear no sunscreen in the sun, or spend a weekend eating junk food without experiencing some negative repercussions. I realize I have to take care of myself...like going to the dentist (something I almost never did as a youth) because I am not young forever.
2. Relationships are more important than things. I think I have always been a believer in this, although I think I am more so now. As a kid in a big family, I never really aspired to acquire much in material possessions. But the older I get, the greater the temptation to buy stuff--cool clothes, electronics, the "good" ice cream at the store. I realize it is harder to focus my efforts and make sure I don't get stuff as a replacement for my happiness. Happiness comes from having good relationships with your friends, family, and, most importantly, your spouse.
3. Achievement in life is not about the end result but in the process. Slap me if I sound too Miley Cyrus, but I really think success is in the journey. For example, last week I decided to run farther than I have in a really LONG time. Now I AM NOT A RUNNER, but I do feel pretty darn good after a run (which in my book can be as short as a few blocks). Since I have been home, I have tried to run a few times a week for about a mile. Pathetic, I know (even more so if you knew my time), but I have kept at it. Last week, I decided to bump up the distance to about 3 miles (and add in a whooping, extra long hill). Of course, I felt like quitting after I had reached my first mile, but I knew I HAD to keep going because I NEEDED to feel successful. Despite the burning feeling in my lungs and butt and the self-defeating thoughts in my head, I completed the 3 miles. Let it be known for the record, that my time was terrible (dare I say? Okay, 37 minutes. Ouch!) and my face was as red as a lobster, but I FINISHED. I can't tell you what confidence this experience gave me...what I learned about myself and my determination. Yeah, life is about "the climb"...literally.
4. Even great movies are unrealistic. I am sure nobody needs to remind you Hollywood is fake...it's a given, right? But don't you sometimes want to think that good, heart warming Hollywood stories can be imitated in real life? For example, this weekend as I lay in my bed trying to de-swell my face, I watched several movies I had rented from the good ole Redbox. One of them, Marley & ME, was better than I expected (I really did think it would be some cheese-ball movie about a perfect suburban couple and their reckless dog...like a more adult version of "Beethoven"). Actually, to be quite frank, I really enjoyed the story and I found the chemistry between Owen Wilson and Jennifer Anniston way adorable...who would have thought Owen Wilson could make it as a yuppie hubby? HOWEVER, I soon realized I got suckered in to many of the myths in the movie...like a) wearing a white mini dress the day after giving birth is completely doable (even I...a non-baby haver...know this can't be done) b) you can play in the Pennsylvania snow in designer jeans and a non-zippered coat for HOURS and not be cold and c) it will be years before you have a break down over being a over-worked mom with a reckless dog. Bottom line? Keep Hollywood in perspective. I totally adored this movie, but I have to recognize life CANNOT imitate art.
5. Here's where I return this conversation back to being useful...the Gospel basics--prayer, scripture reading, church attendance, FHE, temple attendance, fasting, paying tithing, etc. etc.--are really the key to getting through life's trials. This month in the Visiting Teaching lesson, I was really inspired by one of the quotes (laziness prevents me from looking it up here) which basically said we need to "recharge" ourselves with these Gospel basics. So true. There have been times in my life, where I felt so spiritually strong, and other times where I have felt so spiritually vacant. When I was a teenager, I think my testimony was so incredibly strong. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but, in those days, I dealt with a lot of hardship and somehow (I don't really know how) I made it through it all. I think I have relied on my faith of way back then all too often now. Instead of forcing myself to be more spiritual now (a.k.a. be more vigilant about doing those Gospel basics), I am content to rely on the testimony I did then. I realize I need to continually "recharge" my spirit because I am continually encountering new trials. In sum, a testimony is something that is constantly changing, evolving, and hopefully, growing. To grow, a testimony has to be fed with DAILY spiritual nourishment.
Okay, so that's about a wrap for me. Perhaps, being wise has less to do with losing one's teeth and more to do using down time for personal reflection. All the same, it's been a nice weekend for me. Lots of ice cream, movies, and a husband happy to help make my life more comfortable....it doesn't get much better than that.
--A
